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 Assertiveness is a skill for effective communication
and negotiation while respecting the thoughts and feelings of others. Assertive
people are clear about their wants, needs, and boundaries to others and there
remains no question to where they stand. Being assertive means being able to
stand up for what is right, and to say no to something that does not pleases in
a confident, calm, and respectful way which is neither too aggressive nor
passive. It is an important personal and interpersonal skill as in all our
interactions being assertive helps us to express ourselves in a clear, open,
and reasonable way, without undermining our own or other’s rights.

An aggressive communication can ruin relationships for
us because no one likes to be in the company of a person who constantly judges,
argues, disagrees, and does not allow others to share their opinion. While a
passive communication may lead to us feeling misunderstood or unheard and we
may also feel that no one truly listens to us or value our input. However an
assertive communication is way to present our thoughts and beliefs in a clear
manner. Assertiveness is seen as a balance between aggressive and passive types
of personalities.

Assertive behaviour includes –

  • Being
    open in expressing wishes and encouraging others to do the same
  • Listening
    to the views of others and responding appropriately, whether in agreement with
    those views or not
  • Accepting
    responsibilities and being able to delegate to others
  • Regularly
    expressing appreciation of others for what they have done or are doing
  • Being
    able to admit to mistakes and apologise
  • Maintaining
    self control
  • Behaving
    as an equal to others


  • Assertive
    people feel empowered to do whatever it takes to find the best solutions for
    their problems that they face.
  • They
    get things done by treating people with fairness and respect and are treated by
    others in the same way.
  • They
    are self assured and don’t feel threatened or upset when things don’t go as
    planned or as expected.
  • They
    are able to recognize the value of their opponent’s position and can quickly
    find common ground with them.
  • They
    are able to express themselves in a better and calm way which makes the
    communication effective.
  • They
    are confident enough to show that they are brave enough to stand up for what
    the resonate with as well as are in control of what they say.
  • Trust
    is an important part for any communication to take place and being an assertive
    person helps to you get their easily.


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